Saturday, July 21, 2012

Transforming heavy into light

So, I haven’t posted any art journaling pages in a while.
That’s partly because of summer and two energetic kiddos that need a lot of entertaining, but also because Project Life somewhat took over my “spare” time.
I am however doing art journaling pages, but at a MUCH slower pace. I find I come and go in phases when it comes to arts and crafts anyway though. So, I am generally not too concerned when things slow down a bit, as I know they will pick up again.
One thing that has also “slowed” me down a little, is leaving my more familiar style, materials and “way of doing” art journaling behind for this painting. At 9x12 it is also much larger than I am used to!

First of all, let me show you what I am working on and then I’ll fill you in on the process.


See what I mean?
Certainly not my “usual”. Definitely not my go-to colors, and the subject matter - totally not me. Or is it?  I love the colors and I wear them often, even if I don’t use them in my art as much. Hmmm, I wonder why? I got really inspired after watching a youtube tutorial on creating this type of background and subject matter!

Apparently it was time to channel my inner Goth, and ... Dr. Seuss? Who knows!?
All I know is that I’m having such fun with this!

But let me start at the beginning.

As some of you know, I have been digging deep this last year and a half. I’ve really been tackling my past, mostly my childhood, and all the nasty hidden things that have been lurking there for so many years. Unfortunately there is a lot there and much to dig through.
With the help of Energy Psychology modalities such as EFT, Matrix Reimprinting, etc. and a variety of Energy Medicine Modalities, this process has been made a lot faster, a lot easier (even though I would not call it easy by any means) and probably in many ways a lot more meaningful.
I can see myself coming out at the other end now more and more, which is amazing and I am so grateful!

Art Journaling has also helped a lot in the process, even though I am not nearly as free as I would like to be there just yet. It is a process in itself.
One of the things that has been an issue for me, however, is that I don’t really want to have a “heavy” Art Journal!
Do you know what I mean when I say that?
As much as I appreciate the therapeutic value of Art Journaling, I don’t really want to open my journal in  a year’s time, or two or ten and be put right back into that place when I was working through X, Y and Z.
I want the transformative energy, maybe even some of the process, but I don’t want to be dragged back into that space by depressing pages!
But I don’t want to be all pink roses and butterfly in my journal  either though. That would be dishonest and a real disservice to myself! Now and in the future!
I want to be honest in my Art Journal, and most of all authentic! Yes,  I share some of my Art Journal pages with the wider public, but some will never see the light of day, because they were just done for me. I love that this means you can express whatever it is ... all of it, no limits, no etiquette, no pleasing anyone else .... just let it rip, get it out, be done with it, be brutally honest and totally politically incorrect - be me, in the moment! That is after all the purpose of a diary or a journal! Be it artistically expressed or not!
So, how do you combine those two goals?
Well, one way for me has been something like the painting above. You see before this mixed media painting started, I spill-wrote on the entire page. Oddly enough, I don’t even remember what it was all about. Once it was out it was done! I just know that I got a lot of stuff out of my system. Positive, negative, and everything in between!
And once I felt lighter, I started to paint, paste, scribble and stamp over it ... transform it into something completely new! It would have been ok if some of the writing was still visible through it, but that’s not how it ended up.

And all of a sudden the painting feels like what has been going on with me on the inside! It doesn’t feel “covered up”, it feels transformed! Bit by bit I can see how something new is sprouting, how the old broken down stuff isn’t horrible and scary any more, it is becoming the “compost”, as it where, for the new things that are growing.

To me it symbolizes that I am now able to embrace all of it.  When you learn to embrace the shadows, they lose their power! They just become part of the picture!!
Leaving the familiar behind can be a really good thing!

And I’ve been doing a little bit here and a little bit there and it’s still not finished. But right now I have reached another one of those pauses and that’s ok too. I will know when it’s time to pick it up again and do some more with it.
So, that’s some of what has been going on with me.

Have you tried something new lately? In what ways have you left the familiar behind recently?  How do you use your Art Journal as therapy?

3 comments:

  1. I really love this piece. It almost looks if as the moon is really shining. You did a fantastic job on this. The colors are beautiful, and your girl is a cute as she can be. Great Job!!!
    Kimmie <3

    ReplyDelete
  2. I recognized RachO113's inspiration right away. I love her work. You've done a good job of making it your own. I love mixed media and that's how I came to you. Looking around your site now getting familiar. So far so good

    ReplyDelete
  3. I recognized RachO113's inspiration right away. I love her work. You've done a good job of making it your own. I love mixed media and that's how I came to you. Looking around getting to know your site. So far everything looks great.

    ReplyDelete

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Birgit Kerr